How autism looks for us

 I've been wanting to write this post for awhile, but have become very busy. This happens when we move, and I get pregnant, and do more at work. I just checked and realized I haven't posted for a few months, so some updates on us.\

Flynn got diagnosed with autism about 1 month ago. We weren't really surprised, and we are happy to have the diagnosis. It actually helps put a lot of his behaviors and actions into perspective.

If Flynn is left alone in his room, he head bangs. What that means is that he goes onto his hands and knees, rocks, and hits his head on the door repeatedly. We believe he does this because he does not like to be left alone. This happens about three times a day. First thing in the morning, once he wakes up, before Tim is ready for the boys to be out of their rooms. Secondly, when he is put down for a nap in the afternoon. Lastly is when he is put down for bed at night. If Preston is awake, he goes to play with Flynn in the morning. During the other two times, he has to be alone, otherwise he won't rest. We have tried stopping him in various ways, disciplining him, but none of that works. We are currently in the process of making a mat to cover his door. This will be a combination of yoga mats and straps. Hopefully, it will cushion the impact. We are also having him work with therapists at Pediaplex for this.

He likes to play, but prefers to play alone, but within site of others. He tends to either find a toy to attach on one of his fingers, or shoves the toy into his mouth. He really likes to bite and chew. Thankfully, he doesn't often try to bite others, unless he gets really excited or angry.

We are starting to get some improvement with conversation, and this is due to sign language. He is able to sign, "more", "food", "water", "want" and "all done". I know it's not much, but it's something. We, and his therapists, are still working with him to give us "yes" and "no" in the form of head movements.

He also does attempt to make noises more frequently than before. He tends to do this with jumping, especially when he's excited. He never seems to tire from jumping.

He enjoys being hugged or held, but only for as long as he wants it to be. This is the same with reading. If you catch him in the right mood, he will allow you to read.

Flynn should be starting ABA therapy in a couple of months. This will be a half day therapy, every day during the week. They will be working with him on speech, eating, sitting, and other useful skills. Preston has been learning how to better understand his brother, and how to play the way Flynn wants to play. I am thankful that we have more answers and plans for the future.

Sensory Processing Disorder

 We still have yet to get a formal diagnosis for Flynnie. However, we are working off of a possible disorder, that Flynn seems to match pretty well.

First, some terms that need to be understood:

Sensory Integration: is the neurological process that refers to the organization and interpretation of sensory stimulation from the environment. Sensory integration occurs in the central nervous system (brain, spinal cord, and nerves). The process occurs automatically as the body gathers information through the skin, muscles, joints, inner ear, eyes, nose, and mouth.

Sensory Processing Disorder: Problems in the way the brain takes in and responds to information from the environment and one's own senses. This results in problems in processing information and behavior appropriately for the task at hand. Children with this disorder often have a brain that experiences difficulty with adjusting to or regulating responses to sensory inputs. The child either does not react strongly enough or reacts too strongly to sensory input from the environment.

Sensory Seeker: craves excessive stimulation from one or more of the sensory systems (touch, visual, auditory, movement and balance, body awareness, taste, and smell). The child seeks out more stimulation than other children. These children are viewed by others as risk takers and are often in constant motion.

Characteristics of a sensory seeker:

• Spinning
• Climbing too high-no fear
• Climbing on everything
• Crashing into things (people, furniture, walls)
• Mouthing/licking objects (furniture, toys, body)
• Chewing on non-food objects (toys, clothing)
• Eating excessively - craving oral stimulation
• Constantly wrestling or rough housing with siblings and peers
• Touches everything
• Playing with food
• Messy eater
• Over-stuffing their mouth when eating
• Craves spicy and hot foods
• Under-responding to pain (shakes it off quickly)
• Makes a big mess when playing - dumps out toy bins to look at everything
• Engaging in excessive sensory play - seeks it out (mud, water, soap, etc)
• Constantly jumping around
• Frequently pushing others - has difficulty standing in line
• Running barefoot
• Difficulty sitting still
• Falls out of their chair for no apparent reason
• Seeks out loud noises - turns up TV/radio, places battery operated toys against ears, etc
• May have difficulty regulating their volume level - talk loudly
• May hum or talk out loud to self

This explains a bunch of Flynnie's behaviors: how he screams, jumps, bites everything, puts all things in his mouth, does his exercising, and over eats a lot. 

We have been learning how to work with Flynn to help him with his need for excessive stimulation. We give him a toy to help him focus. We read to him, and give him bear hugs. We also have him roll on a ball to help him focus and give a bunch of stimulation to his body. We also try calming music at night to help him relax. We know that this is a work in progress, but at least now, we understand a bit more of why he acts the way he does. We are better learning to enter his world. 

Fatherhood

Today, I reflect one three fathers: Terry Harbison, Ray Brown, and Tim Harbison.

Terry and Kathi started dating 40 years ago. Kathi kept in contact with Terry during his mission, and got married shortly after he returned from serving in Spain. They were married in 1984, and had their first son, Eric, in 1985. Four years later, they had Tim, the man I married. They later had two other boys, Kenny and Chris, all of which are now married with children of their own. Terry was active in his church callings, through The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. His various callings included: a member of the Bishopric, High Priest group leader, and primary teacher. His true passion was teaching, and he taught for about 6 years. He taught government and economics, and history. Terry would take Kathi to summer musicals, and they frequently would go to the Arboretum for walks. He was diagnosed with frontal temporal dementia in 2015. He retired from teaching, and spent a couple of years at home with Kathi after his diagnosis. He later got moved to Golden Acres Nursing Home. Terry enjoyed visitors, and was able to see his children, siblings, and mother frequently. He loved his grandchildren, and tried to play with Preston and Flynn whenever he was capable of doing that. On Sunday, the family got the call that he was not doing well, so many of us visited him to say our good-byes. On Tuesday, he was diagnosed with COVID-19. Today, on Thursday, he went home to return to live with his savior, Jesus Christ.

Raymond Brown was born on July 23. Today, he turns 63 years old. He has been an amazing father to me, and has taught me so much about being an amazing parent. He has always, and will always, be a great cheerleader for me. He has gone to all of my track meets, concerts, and even traveled to Rwanda to enjoy a new land with me. I have loved traveling with my family to many locations through the years. My dad worked for a long time as an electrical and systems engineer for BAE Systems. Since leaving his job as an engineer, he is now working more on hiking, running, and volunteering. He does an amazing job with Preston and Flynn.

Tim is the third father I would like to mention. He learned how to be a father early on in our marriage. He was meant to be a father; it is truly something that he excels at, that he was made to be. He has patience, more so than I have, and is a great teacher to our boys. He is very kind and sincere. I can see all of the love in him.

Updates on Flynn

Let me start off this one by saying that we do not have a diagnosis, other than your generic "developmental delay". We had Flynn evaluated by a pediatric neurologist, who checked his growth, his reflexes, and then said, "it's probably autism", and wanted to order an EEG and an MRI. He didn't actually do any testing on him. We then looked into getting Flynn tested for autism, and learned that the majority of places that do autism testing do not perform the tests until the children are at least 3 years old. Flynn is 2 years and 4 months. We did find one location that does testing prior to age 3, however the reviews and what they were telling us did not sound good, so we have decided to wait.

Here are some of the new things that Flynn has been doing:

• Pointing more (with books, toys, and once at an animal at the zoo)
• Chatting more (B, D, M)
• Focusing longer (he is really good at getting your attention, and holding your face in place while he investigates)
• Interested in books
• Improvement climbing stairs
• He is responding to commands more. He responds to, "come here", "stop", or if you call his name, he will more likely look at you.

We even got a progress note from his occupational therapist this week:

"Today we practiced: bilateral integration, visual motor, motor planning, hand/upper extremity strength, manual dexterity, upper extremity coordination, and vestibular/proprioceptive input.

Today I: participated and finished my work, used good listening skills.

Flynn was able to tolerate sitting on the platform swing for ~5 minutes during the motor activities for vestibular input. He was able to independently pull apart large pop beads 3 times and able to push them together 1 time, and required physical assist for the other trials. Flynn required physical assistance to imitate vertical lines to improve pre-writing skills. He was able to roll a ball back and forth with a partner with some physical assistance required to improve joint attention and bilateral coordination. Good job, Flynn!"

We are very proud for the progress that Flynn continues to show.

Second Wave of COVID-19

So, what we thought was going to happen in the winter is now happening in the summer. The second wave of COVID has started to hit. We are starting to see more and more cases of COVID. This is a mixture of a few things. We now have the capability of testing more individuals, both those who are symptomatic and asymptomatic. We are starting to have more folks in the hospital. However, there are still some positives. We are seeing fewer and fewer deaths.

What does this mean for Texas? We are now having mandated mask wearing in the public sphere. We are bringing down the capacity of businesses from 75% to 50%. But what if we don't like wearing masks? Folks may find them uncomfortable, itchy, difficulty breathing, etc. Would you want surgeons to not wear masks when they are operating on you? No, you want them to do all the extra precautions so you do not get sick. Okay, but I have asthma, and I cannot breathe with the masks on. Alright, well, this physician as well has asthma, and I have become adjusted to it over the past 3 months. Everyone can get used to wearing things that are uncomfortable. Technically, underwear, shoes, are all uncomfortable, but we have become socialized to follow this. We can still not shame folks that do not agree with us. For me, I will wear a mask in public, but I will not yell at those who do not wear masks. If I am concerned about someone who isn't wearing a mask, I will kindly ask them to socially distance. I will not shun or yell at them.

I am still spending time with friends and family. I am actually really excited to go to church this week. My church has divided the church body into 6 groups and has only some of us together at once. We will be wearing masks, sitting in separate pews, not singing, no handshakes or hugs. But, it is worthwhile. Being a part of a group again, spending time together, even if it is small. It is like being a part of the body of Christ. Even though it is every 6 weeks, I am so glad to be back at church, and to see my friends again.

We will make through this, together.

Week 3 of Therapy and Overcoming Depression

Flynnie has both made progress and had issues over this past week.

In therapy, they have recommended that he works on imitation. For example, if we are playing with cars, and roll it, we should make noise, and have him try to roll the cars with us. They also recommended that we sing songs with him, especially ones with hand motions. The ones that Flynn prefers are "Baby Shark" and "The Wheels on the Bus". We also need to work on getting him to focus, to have him watch us and work directly with us for extended periods of time. This is very difficult, especially given that Flynn loves to be mobile and always be on the move. They recommend that we do more story time, more drawing, and get him to sit with us. They say that he has improved with pointing and that he has become very good at puzzles, and that he figures them out quickly.

This week, we took Flynn and Preston out to the splash pad. We believe that a day or so prior to that, Flynn must have gotten into some poison ivy. He has had a worsening, spreading rash over his body. We have been applying hydrocortisone cream, benadryl cream, and calamine lotion. We were able to get him some oral prednisolone, which will also help with his rash. Flynn has been doing well with the rash, it only bothers him every once in a while.

On overcoming depression, it has been a hard time. I have had many good moments and many bad moments as well. I learned more about myself over this time. I have learned more about the importance of medication. How medication can be useful for stabilizing people. How depression is a real thing, feeling numb, feeling all the emotions at once, they can all occur. But, I was able to keep moving forward. I had the support of my wonderful husband, of my amazing family. I kept trying, knowing that each day could possibly get better. And eventually, it did. I have been able to smile, been able to laugh, been able to enjoying my time again. This does not mean that I'll be good forever. What this does mean, is that I know what to do the next time I struggle. I know that struggling is important. It allows me to overcome, to become stronger, and keep on moving. Moving towards the future, with God leading the way.

Week 2 of Therapy

We have been working with Flynn for just over a week now. Tim was able to go in during the therapy session with him today, thanks to having someone watch Preston. 

Occupational Therapy:

Flynn is working on his pincer grasp, which is the motion of having one's thumb and index finger go together. This is the position that your hand goes to hold a pen or a pencil. He has also been working on putting toys that can be attached together and pulling them apart. He has shown a lot of improvement on jumping. He also needs to work on pointing at objects with one finger as opposed to his entire hand. 

Speech Therapy:

Currently, they are not concerned with a possible tongue tie. Tongue movements are significantly used for producing the L&T sounds. Those sounds are not commonly used at his age. However, today I did notice that Flynn was "ta-ta"ing at me. Flynn also needs to work on improving his length of focusing. He, like most children, can only pay attention for a short period of time before losing interest. He started working on identifying objects and items on flashcards, which he is getting right about half of the time. This is where his lack of focus is really playing a part. Flynn is also working on colors, especially ones that start with "B", like blue, brown, and black, because that is one of the sounds that he is working on.

We are going to try to have one of us, either me or Tim, visit the therapy appointments about every other week. That will allow us to learn from the therapists, and to allow Flynnie to have one-on-one time as well.

Progress with Flynn

This past week has been a good one for Flynn. We have finally been able to make some headway with him. I bought a large red ball, and he now wants to roll it back and forth with us. He is also jumping more properly, and wants to walk the stairs.

For awhile, we were concerned that he might have a tie tongue. We had not seen him stick out his tongue or lick anything. Yesterday, I got Flynn to stick his tongue out. He was able to lick some baby food off of my finger.

Another part of therapy has been getting Flynn to sign "more" in order to ask for food. We have agreed that anytime he moves his two hands together, that it would count. He occasionally would freak out and throw a tantrum, but now he is actually moving his hands together more often than not in order to indicate wanting food.

Today, he even started roaring at us. This is incredible, because I do not remember him ever doing that before. He has been making so many sounds today, "B"s, "M"s, "R"s, etc. It just makes me so excited, that he is willing to learn. We are able to begin to communicate, which I love.

Four years a doctor

Today marks four years a doctor. Four years ago I graduated medical school from Lake Erie College of Osteopathic Medicine. I had a brand new baby boy, that I was still getting used to. I had my parents with me, and I had no idea what the future was going to hold. I didn't know what I was going to do with the rest of my life.

I did family medicine residency because I had to scramble into it. I honestly wanted to be an OB-GYN initially because I find pregnancy so fascinating. I did not want to be a family doctor at first. However, I learned so much in those years. I learned about taking care of children, about taking care of pregnant patients, and all ages. Not all of the training has been fun. The long hours, the many memories missed from children, the stress, and not knowing if I'm doing things properly, that all was very hard. But, it was so worth it. I have learned so many lessons from each person I interacted with.

There are many memories, both good and bad, that I will always remember. Telling a patient that they have cancer and I'm not sure they have left to live. Delivering babies and meeting many family members in the process. Having to take care of mothers as they deliver babies who have not made it. Doing procedures to remove skin lesions, with and without anesthesia. Watching children grow through the years. Having some of my beloved patients die, after they have struggled. 

Today, on the beginning of my fifth year of being a doctor, I had an interesting day. I removed a cyst off of a patient's ear without anesthesia, because they didn't want anesthesia. I did so many paps, which used to be difficult, and now are like my bread and butter. I got to see babies, and take care of them. I was able to perform procedures for fun. I was able to do OMT and see immediate improvement in a patient's pain. I had my MA and front staff take care of me to keep me safe in various patient scenarios. I have learned that my girls have my back whatever occurs. I had not expected to have that camaraderie this early on. I am also running a clinic, which has been both the most stressful and the most rewarding experience ever. I have never learned so much in such a short period of time. 

I am very thankful that I am a doctor. I truly believe that this is what I was meant to do. Most days, I love my job. This doesn't mean that it's always easy, or always fun, but most days I am able to leave feeling satisfied. I hope that I will continue to grow and have fun for the years to come.

Flynnie starting therapy

Flynnie is my second born son. I have noticed that something was off with him for awhile. He was not making the same noises that Preston had made in the same time period. I noticed that he also was not doing other milestones in the same time period. Around 9 months of age, he started doing something that I found very concerning. He would go on his hands and knees and rock back and forth. He would bang his head against the door or the wall. He has caused thickened skin in that area of his forehead. He has also worn off the skin before and had scabs form. He has done this multiple times a day, everyday, including now.

I have been trying to get Flynn in for therapy for over a year now. I'm very thankful to now be in the Dallas-Fort Worth region, where there are a lot of medical options. It was difficult, initially, to get Flynn into therapy. I originally had Flynn's "establish care" appointment in the end of March. However, then COVID happened, and he actually is not establishing care until Thursday of this week. Through a lot of phone calls, and working with an amazing medical assistant named Stephanie (pictured below), we had referrals placed to various locations until we found one with a reasonable copay.

The place that we are currently going to is called PediaPlex. It is great, because it is really close to where we live, and they have multiple subspecialties located in the same place. Flynn has had his first evaluations with both speech therapy and with occupational therapy. I finally received his report today.

From speech therapy, he has been given the diagnosis of Mixed receptive-expressive language disorder. He was administered the Preschool Language Scale 5th Edition (PLS-5) and was found to have deficits in many domains. His auditory comprehension score was a 50, in the 1st percentile, age equivalent of 10 months. His expressive communication score was 50, 1st percentile, age equivalent of 5 months. His total language score was 50, 1st percentile, age equivalent of 7 months. He has a few long term goals including: client will increase use of expressive language skills through mastery of short-term goals within a 6-12 month period, client will increase use of receptive language skills through mastery of short term goals within a 6-12 month period. Currently, our homework is to practice the "M" and "B" sounds with Flynn, because they are at the front of the mouth and use the lips with speech. We are also attempting to teach him the ASL sign for "more", that way he can communicate when he wants more food.

"More"

For occupational therapy, he was administered the Peabody Developmental Motor Scales-2 (PDMS-2). He was found to be in the 37% for grasping (average) and 16% for visual-motor interpretation (below average). Overall, Flynn does demonstrate sensory sensitivities in the areas of Propioceptive and Vestibular processing. He seeks out movement (climbing, constant movement, rocking) for sensory input and to improve his self-regulation level. Flynn's difficulty to adequately process and regulate sensory input directly impacts his motor skills, speech and language skills, and activity level. For homework on the OT side, we are working on: rolling a ball back and forth between him and someone else, and we are working on holding onto a surface and jumping using his knees and hips.

It's all for this little guy. We are rooting for him and will help him as much as we can.

Gratitude and Experiment

Days 20&21: Gratitude and 21 Day Experiment

I am grateful for many things. 

I'm thankful that Flynn expresses himself through jumping and squealing for joy. I'm thankful that Preston is so focused and works hard. 

I'm thankful that Preston likes to help his parents with tasks. 

I'm thankful that Flynn loves to eat. 

I'm thankful that Tim stays home and helps take care of the boys. 

I'm thankful for my job, and that it's something I enjoy doing. 

I'm thankful that I'm a doctor. 

I'm thankful that I work for a company that allows me to grow and build my practice the way I want it to.

I'm thankful that I have the capability to make patient laugh and to heal.

I'm thankful that I follow God.

I'm thankful for my Church.

I'm thankful that Jesus came to earth for me, and would do it all again if I were the only person on the earth.

I'm thankful for my parents and all their love and support.

I'm thankful for Kathi and how much love she shows our family.

Day 21:

This has been a very interesting experiment to participate in. It was perfect timing being in the midst of the COVID pandemic, and it allows me to document things about myself. One of the things that I learned about myself is that depression is a very real thing. 

I am currently in the middle of a depression. Tim has been very helpful through this all. I had a patient who tested positive for COVID who came into the office for benign complaints, and then I got an email the following day. Because of that, I had to get tested for COVID. That is not a pleasant experience. Over the next couple of days as I was awaiting the results, I was a bunch of nerves. I was so scared that I had COVID and that I was going to give it to my boys. I believe that is when my depression episode started. 

I have realized that it's okay for me to be in a depression. I have been on medications for years, and I have had to have adjustments periodically. I've been surprised that some people have been so opinionated about my depression. It's made me feel like folks have not dealt with people in the middle of a depressive episode before. It's okay for me to be in this depressive episode. Talking with Tim, I have realized that I am actually doing a lot better now, in the midst of my current episode, then I have in the past. I am a lot calmer, and I don't have such extremes of behavior. 

Even though I am in the middle of a depressive episode, does not mean that all days are bad, or that I feel sad all of the day. Yesterday was very hard for me, from the moment I woke up, to when I came home from work. But then Tim had us do lip syncing and that really helped. Today was a good day. Does that mean I'm done with this current episode? No, but that's okay. I can still press forward and keep moving onward.

Religion and Siblings

Day 18: Religion

I believe that Jesus is the Savior of the world. I believe that he is the son of God. I believe that Jesus visited the world and healed many, taught many, and taught us a better way to worship. 

I miss Church. In church, my husband and I used to teach 3-4 year old children. It is fun to go over basic truths and see how the children take to it. I miss the community and the children.

Day 19: Siblings

I don't have any siblings. I always wanted to have siblings. Instead, I have tried my best to have my children to enjoy each other's company. I love watching how they interact with each other. I love that Preston loves his younger brother. I want them to be friends forever.

Dad and Prayer

Day 17: Dad

One of the biggest lessons that I have learned from my Dad is to follow the promptings of the Lord. He taught me the importance of prayer, and to follow the Lord always. I have not always had the easiest time with prayer. Sometimes, it feels as though I'm talking to myself. However, at the hardest times, some of my lowest points in my life, I know that God hears me and answers my prayers. He may not always answer the way that we want, but he does answer. 

I may be in a period of growth. Growth comes in many different forms. Mine has taught me that it's okay at times to not always be happy. That it is okay to seek help from others. That it's okay to open up to the ones that you trust. That even though I may be sad, I can still find periods of happiness and joy. I have learned that I can still help others when I am struggling. I can still help my husband, my boys, and my patients. I may not know what may be happening next, but I know who I can trust.

Traditions

Day 16: Traditions and Blessings

One of the traditions that was started for me as a child, and we have continued with my children is birthday prayers. Every year that I can remember, I would either sit in my Dad's lap, or sit near my Dad. Then, my Dad would place his hands on my head, and offer a prayer of blessing and guidance. I would always look forward to these prayers. We have been fortunate to continue these with our two children on their birthdays.

Another thing that I am very thankful my husband is able to do for me are blessings. Since Tim has the Melchizedek priesthood, he is able to confer blessings to others when they ask. Most of the time, they are either for healing or comfort. Tim does not know what he's going to say prior to placing his hands on the recipient's head. He has said that it's like getting a direct line from God, and says what God tells him to at that point. Once the blessing is completed, the direct line stops. Whenever I have received blessings from my husband, it has always been on something that I needed guidance or support wise. I look forward to my boys growing up to be able to do the same for others. I know they have been helpful to me.

Newsworthy

Day 15: Newsworthy

Today, the prompt asked about what's going on in the world right now. I wrote about that yesterday, which is COVID-19. So instead, let me tell you about something I am currently obsessed with:

CELLS AT WORK!!

Season One, currently on Netflix, talks about the cells that make up our bodies. It follows mainly two characters: a very ditzy red blood cell that gets lost easily, and a neutrophil (a specific type of white blood cell) that kills first, and asks questions later. Every episode, something goes wrong in the body, whether it be heatstroke, cancer, Staph Aureus infection, or food poisoning. And then, here's where the real cool part happens. What it seen on the show are the actual processes that the body does to fix the problem. Like how naive T-cells train in the thymus gland to learn regular body cells from pathogens, and how the T-cells that attack the wrong ones are "washed away" from the body.

It looks like there will be a second season next January, but it is unsure if it will follow the current Cells at Work manga, or if this will follow one of the other off shoots. Either way, it's a fun educational way to spend some time and learn something new in the process.

Trailer for Cells at Work

COVID-19

Day 14: COVID-19

Whoever knew that something so small, a virus of all things, could cause so much stress, harm, and deaths. I have so many thoughts in my head concerning COVID-19. Especially when before this happened, telling a patient, "You have a virus, I can't give you any antibiotics" use to mainly frustrate folks, but not scare them. Now, if I think someone has a viral infection, I have to calm their nerves that it isn't the COVID.

I was not expecting for all to occur that has with this pandemic. I was not expecting to have to wear scrubs daily, to get used to wearing masks, and to treat everyone as if they were infected. I was not expecting to check stats on COVID daily, to discuss with patients the status of the world and that no one really feels safe anymore. I was not expecting the anxiety level to skyrocket, both for patients and for myself. I was not expecting to have to deal with such bored kids, I was not expecting to enjoy playing board games so much. I was not expecting to go into a depression, having a hard time dealing with life day to day. 

I hope this ends soon. I hope I'm able to be with my friends and family again. I hope that my depression lifts. I hope I get the motivation to run again. I hope I don't completely ignore my kids when I'm home. I hope that I still keep doctoring well through all of this. 

I just want to be happy again.

Funny

Day 13: Funny

Today, I'm supposed to write about funny things, embarrassing things, things that make me laugh until I cry. There is a show that Tim and I watch, when the boys are in bed, called "Task Master". It is a British show, where a couple of comedians make other comedians do odd things, video tape it, and then judge them, giving out arbitrary points, to win weird prizes, and the winner of each season gets a "gold" version of the Task Master's head. They have had to do tasks such as, get a high-five from a fifty five year old, or create a dance routine to a ringtone. It is a worthwhile show, and the episodes are currently on YouTube.

(https://www.comedy.co.uk/tv/taskmaster/special/series_4_outtakes/)

Another TV show that Tim and I indulge in after the boys are in bed is called, "Love Island-Australia". On this reality TV show, various gorgeous people living in Australia go to a villa in Spain to find love. What they tend to find instead is a lot of back stabbing, and drama. What Tim and I love about this TV show is the narrator. The narrator is an Irish guy who makes fun of the contestants. He realizes just how shallow and petty they are, and teases them, without their knowledge. We have also become a fan of one of the contestants because he is known as a kangatarian, someone who follows a vegetarian diet except for kangaroo meat. Justin. He is absolutely hilarious, he is a pretty boy, with about nothing else going on for him. He keeps being surprised why the woman on the villa are not interested in him. Tim and I find it pretty funny whenever he does silly things, like strip teases, calls himself, "the dickmaster" or sings off key. Please don't spoil when he goes home.

(https://www.capitalfm.com/news/tv-film/love-island/australia-kangatarian-contestant/)

Mom, Travel, and Love

First off, let me be honest and say how difficult this time has been for me. Between stress at work, some stress at home regarding my son, it's just, hard. I have started to hate the phrase, "How are you?" because most of the time, folks don't want the honest truth. They want an answer that will placate them. Very few people want what's going in on my head. So, yes, I'm still semi struggling. Some days are better than others. And if you ask me a direct question, I may or may not give you a real answer, whether or not I think you want the real answer.

So, back to what I'm supposed to be writing.

Day 10: Mom

I have learned what it means to be a mother from my mom. I know that it sounds very cliche, but she has given me so much. How to treat others, how to show compassion, how to take care of others. She has shown me what it's like to have a passion for life, a passion for learning new things, for reading, for loving nature. I remember her taking care of me multiple times when I have been sick. I remember watching movies together, I remember traveling to more places that I can honestly remember, I remember reading books together as a family. I have been trying to do the same for my boys. To be so self-less and so serving of others. I want to learn how to do more fun things for my boys, to have boundless patience and kindness for them. I know my boys miss their Muppa.

Day 11: Travel

Right now, the only traveling I want to do is to see my parents. I miss my family so much.

Day 12: Love

Timothy Jacob Harbison is my one true love. I had thought I had understood love before, but then I met him. Heck, I was even engaged before, due to get married, and that ended up failing. I have had guy after guy leave me out to dry. Then, as God would have it, I met Tim while he was doing an internship in Ithaca, NY. I was definitely the one who was the pursuer of Tim. Thankfully, I never scared him off. I told him all about me, all of my baggage and the bad stuff, during our first date. The next day, we became boyfriend and girlfriend. Within a week we were discussing marriage. We got engaged 4 months later, and 6 months after that, got married. Now, we have been married for 5 years and have two wonderful boys together. It may not have been the most traditional thing, but I would never change it.

Aunts and Uncles

Day 9: Aunts and Uncles

Aunt Jan: an amazing singer, worked for a GI doctor for a long time, and used to give me Eneman styled gifts
Uncle Calvin: very sincere about his beliefs, loves the Red Sox, goal to visit all of the major league baseball fields
Aunt Corona: the life of the party, loves to sing, very funny
Aunt Sandi: tea parties, spending time at the beach or the lake
Uncle Steve: great sense of humor, teases a lot, sincere
Aunt Rowena: artist, loving, family is all
Uncle Philip: soft spoken, kind
Aunt Glenda: teacher, fighter, survivor
Uncle Frank: birder, Oklahoma

Games and Friends

Day 7: Games

Tim and I love playing games. For the longest time, we have had the hardest time finding ones that we could play as just two people. That is, until we found Villainous. Villainous is a board game that allows folks to play some of your favorite Disney villains. You can play as Scar, Jafar, Ursula, Queen of Hearts, or someone else. You try to stop each other from succeeding by fating each other, bringing various heroes out from the stories. You can play multiple people together at once.

Another game that we have really enjoyed is called, "Call to Adventure". This game is a lot like dungeons and dragons. You have to create the best story by earning cards by rolling various runes. The person with the most points at the end wins.

Day 8: Friends
There are a couple of friends that I have had for a longer period of time. Two of my longest friends are Kati and Ashley. I met Kati in second grade, and my Mom helped walk her to school with me every morning. Kati and I have had been in various classes together throughout the years. We both played clarinet, and we even went to senior prom together. I was able to go to her wedding and she came to mine. We've been a part of each other's lives. I definitely miss seeing her in person.

Ashley is a sweetheart that I've known since third grade. We went to church together, and always would make time for each other whenever I was in town. I was always the one of the two of us that would travel out of state, or out of country. She is someone that I trust, and that I share with.

To me, friends are important people. It is easy to be friendly with someone without being friends. But, friends are there for you. If you have a bad day, or just got engaged, they are the ones that you call. One of my bestest friends is Emily. I have only known this lady since I was a junior in high school and she was a freshman. We bonded over music, and being nerds together. We even created a group in high school called, "The Crazy Band Geeks". I still try to connect with her every so often.

Anyway, when you find a true friend, it's like finding someone that you always knew, that makes you happy.

A Day in the Life

Day Six's prompt is to write about work. I would like to write about my favorite job, which is my current job.

This is what it's like to be a doctor:

I wake up at 6:10 am every morning and get myself dressed and hair in buns so as to keep in away from my face. I leave by 7:10-15 am, and arrive at office by 7:45 am.

Once I arrive, I check all the temperatures for the two fridges and the freezer.  I have to ensure that all the vaccines are kept in working order. I then check to see what notes I have left over from the day before. I try to finish off the notes within 24 hours of seeing a patient, so that way I don't forget things. I then get masked up, double masked up, and ready to see the first wave of patients. From diabetes management, to high blood pressure, to abscess drainage, to birth control management. I try to help others by communicating with them. I try to develop rapport, and get the patients comfortable with me. I try to learn more about their families, and become one with them, in a sense. After a quick lunch, I am able to spend some quality time doing Osteopathic Manipulative Therapy (OMT for short). I love working directly on patient's bodies, because I feel like I am able to help them quicker, when I use my hands. I have seen such great results over time. I continue to take care of folks, speak some butchered Spanish, and most of my patients leave with smiles. It has been a full day.

I love the relationships that I get to develop with patients. Some of them become like friends or family. I love watching people grow and change over the years. From meeting a family in the labor and delivery room, to taking care of their baby, to learning about them getting pregnant again, taking care of both of them, delivering, and all that wonderfulness. Being able to help others and make a change. Exemplifying what Jesus is, and what He does, is what I love to do.

I was meant to be a doctor.

Story by pictures and joining Holmes' team

Today's challenge was to describe my day via pictures, and anyone who knows me knows that I like pictures, so here goes!

Young at Heart reminding all patients to please wear a mask.

Learning about today's brief.

Taking a breather in between patients.

Realizing that a patient thought I was only 15 years old today...

Working on some research when the time allows.

Leaving work after a full day of seeing all types of patients, including my favorite, pregnant ones.

Thanking Halli for the wonderful meal.

Showing off the growing terrarium.

Brothers playing nicely together.

Pig pile on Daddy.

A rare smile from Flynnie..

Happy Preston.

Wearing Mommy's hat.

Mystery letter from Sherlock Holmes

The game is afoot...more to come...